In my long and checkered past I have actually been trained to sell bras. I measured and explained and didn't even know that what I'd been trained to tell my customers was, largely bull****.
For starters, we carried the size I bought for myself: A 44 DDD. Trying it on in the store, it looked good. I wasn't concerned that it hurt when I reached for things and especially when I took it off at night. That was just the way all the bras I'd ever had had been.
After a couple of weeks, the 44DDD stretched and my breasts were shoved down onto my rib cage. That didn't concern me, because all the bras I'd ever had hurt and eventually stretched out of shape. By the way, back then, my breasts didn't lie heavy on my ribcage when I was bra-less.
The fact of the matter was that somehow, we large busted women didn't expect that bras could be as comfortable, functional and pretty as the bras C cup ladies could buy.
My bra sales training included the fact that when dealing with someone like me, whose breasts were obviously too big for anything we sold, to give her the 44DDD and assure her that even it it wasn't comfortable now, soon "It will stretch."
I didn't know then what I know now. You don't need to put up with "fitters" like me, who don't know what "fit" is.
Below, you'll find just about everything you'll ever need to know to find and look and feel fabulous in a gorgeous bra.
Let's start with terminology. While different companies may use different terms, these are the concepts you need to understand:
Bra styles
"Full coverage" means that the bra cup covers all, or nearly all of your breast. Your breast isn't supposed to stick out above a full coverage bra.
It can be hard to judge this in Redcats catalog shots, since often models are wearing bras that obviously don't fit. The breast is bulging up over the top edge of the bra cup.
Another way to tell if the bra is too small is to check your profile in a mirror. If you have cleavage on top but your nipples are pointing slightly (or very) downward, the cup is too small to accomadate your bountiful boobies. You need a larger cup size AND a different salesperson.
"Balconnettes" are cut to cover only the lower 2/3rds of the breast. If you want a balconnette bra, buy one from a reputable dealer, like Bravissimo.com In their catalogs, they show exactly how the bra should fit you.
The other "sexy" bra is the plunge bra, which exposes a V shape opening, baring you from your shoulders to your bra band line. These are made to show off your cleavage AND keep you cool on hot days or during hot flashes. If you tend to overheat it can be lots cooler in a plunge bra.
There are currently NO bra styles that are supposed to squeeze your breasts together into a single shelf. Even "shelf bras" that you find built into some exersize tops or swim suits are supposed to lift your breasts without squashing them together. That squashed together look is referred to as a "Uniboob" and has been not only sweaty and uncomfortable, but out of style for decades.
A good bra lifts and separates you breasts. If the cup fits, the center of the bra should not lift off of your breastbone. Uniboobs may come back into style some day. Until then, INSIST on larger cup size.
Bras FIT you (or DON'T) based on
Chest band
This is the measurement that you get when you measure around your chest,keeping the tape even with the ground and touching the chest wall along the lower edge of your breasts.
When you read “44 D” the 44 is this chest band measurement, in inches. The D is the cup size.
This is the measurement that you get when you measure around your chest,keeping the tape even with the ground and touching the chest wall along the lower edge of your breasts.
When you read “44 D” the 44 is this chest band measurement, in inches. The D is the cup size.
The chest band ties the cups together and around you. In a well engineered, properly fitting full cup or balconnette bra, the band will hold the bra in place, with or without bra straps.
All chest bands (being elastic) DO stretch with wear.
The solution? Buy bands that fit on the loosest hooks, so that as the band stretches and gets looser, you can take up the slack using the built in "tighter" hooks.
Or, buy cups that fit (for me, that's a 38 J) and buy bra extenders at your local fabric store. I need two extenders for a new bra. As the bands stretch, I use one, or, eventually, none. This means that what, for someone else, would be an old, streched out bra, still fits me perfectly after 2 or 3 years!
CUP SIZE
Projection Projection refers to how far your breasts sticks out from your chest wall when NOT being smooshed by an inhumane bra.
You don’t want a bra that folds your breasts inside the cup. They should lie, full length in the cup without being squeezed or compressed. Remember, folding and compressing skin anyplace on your body can get in the way of good blood circulation and, in this case, optimal breast health.
A properly fitted bra lifts your breasts up off your rib cage so that air circulates under them and points them forward, never down. A cup size that's too small will look good in the store, then in a few weeks (or days) of use. Then, the chest band will stretch out and force your breasts to fall and point down, against your ribs. (see Chest Bands) This throws the stress points of the bra off so that the underwire digs into your ribs, the bra strap digs into your shoulders and the side boning of the bra digs into your ribs and or armpits, while the band pulls up in back.
Even after the 10th laundering, your bra should not pull away from your chest.
The center of the bra where the two cups touch or nearly touch should lie flat aganst the breastbone and there shouldn’t be any digging, ANYWHERE.
If your bra digs, it doesn’t fit.
If the center if the bra where the cups meet pulls way from your chest, the cups are too small or the band is too loose.
Unlike bands, cups don't usually stretch with wear, so make sure they fit perfectly.
Breast Circumference
Cup shapes are NOT uniform! Some cups are made for wide breasts that meet in the middle, some are made for narrow ones, spaced inches apart. Think of the base of your breast as a circle. You want a cup size that goes along the edges of that circle, NOT one that leaves red marks 2 or even 3 inches below or to the sides of your breast!
Circumference is how the bra cup encircles the base of the breast. The entire breast needs to be inside the cup or you’ll have pressure marks (even blisters!) where the edges of the cup cut in on the top, band edge and /or side. Nothing should press dents into your skin or leave red marks or bulges in your clothing that you don’t want.
In order to get a cup where my breast lies straight and uncompressed, I have to buy a size 38 J. My band measurement is 44, so "fitters" always gave me a size 44. The cups were always too wide. But the cup on a 38J is narrower than the cup on a 44J. I make up the difference on band size by hooking on one or two bra extenders. I just buy them online from Joanne'sFabrics.com
Once I realized that was an option, I found I could get bras to fit perfectly, NOT dig, and not even be noticable (no pain) during the day.
The other benefit was that everyone suddenly complemented me on my "weight loss" ! But it was true. With a comfy, well fitted bra your body looks in better proportion. You're likely to become more active, too, because nothing hurts!
Breast Shape
Cup shapes are NOT uniform! Some cups are made for wide breasts that meet in the middle, some are made for narrow ones, spaced inches apart. Think of the base of your breast as a circle. You want a cup size that goes along the edges of that circle, NOT one that leaves red marks 2 or even 3 inches below or to the sides of your breast!
Circumference is how the bra cup encircles the base of the breast. The entire breast needs to be inside the cup or you’ll have pressure marks (even blisters!) where the edges of the cup cut in on the top, band edge and /or side. Nothing should press dents into your skin or leave red marks or bulges in your clothing that you don’t want.
In order to get a cup where my breast lies straight and uncompressed, I have to buy a size 38 J. My band measurement is 44, so "fitters" always gave me a size 44. The cups were always too wide. But the cup on a 38J is narrower than the cup on a 44J. I make up the difference on band size by hooking on one or two bra extenders. I just buy them online from Joanne'sFabrics.com
Once I realized that was an option, I found I could get bras to fit perfectly, NOT dig, and not even be noticable (no pain) during the day.
The other benefit was that everyone suddenly complemented me on my "weight loss" ! But it was true. With a comfy, well fitted bra your body looks in better proportion. You're likely to become more active, too, because nothing hurts!
Breast Shape
If your breasts are shaped like two equal halves of a globe, with perfectly centered nipples, placed so they point slightly up, congratulations! Either you're genetically blessed, or you have a marvelous surgeon!
As to everyone else, NO, you are not a freak if your breasts are not perfectly symetric and perfectly matched. Almost everyone has a larger and a smaller breast. Their shapes may not match perfectly, and nipples point in whichever direction they happen to point, be it up, down, or sideways. Breasts can have a flat side or be cone shaped. They come in almost endless variations of shapes. This is normal. Don't worry unless the shape begins to change or you find a difference in texture, thickened skin, or a lump or hard spot.
You need to learn about breast self exams, to be vigilant about changes that could mean cancer. Even very tiny lumps, unfamiliar indentations or bulges, puckering or changes in the texture of the surface skin need to be checked by your doctor immediately.
Other than that, anything that's normal for you that you don't like is just a cosmetic problem.
Luckily, we live in an era of engineering. Bras exist that can support, gently reshape and, if you wish, augment without causing discomfort or damage.
Most American companies have plastic foam bands to support the breasts. For me, that causes a skin rash, but until I found better designs (Check out Goddess's brand, "Kiera" style. It has lift, great shaping and is so well engineered that I sometimes tuck the straps and wear it strapless.) Anyway, until I found that, I would use pieces of cotton to separate my skin from the plastic. Inconvenient, but it worked. By the way, Goddess's "Keira" style is a nearly full coverage bra that comes in RED, navy blue, black, brown and nude. they even have animal prints. Every season you lose a few colors and get new ones in.
Breast balance
As to everyone else, NO, you are not a freak if your breasts are not perfectly symetric and perfectly matched. Almost everyone has a larger and a smaller breast. Their shapes may not match perfectly, and nipples point in whichever direction they happen to point, be it up, down, or sideways. Breasts can have a flat side or be cone shaped. They come in almost endless variations of shapes. This is normal. Don't worry unless the shape begins to change or you find a difference in texture, thickened skin, or a lump or hard spot.
You need to learn about breast self exams, to be vigilant about changes that could mean cancer. Even very tiny lumps, unfamiliar indentations or bulges, puckering or changes in the texture of the surface skin need to be checked by your doctor immediately.
Other than that, anything that's normal for you that you don't like is just a cosmetic problem.
Luckily, we live in an era of engineering. Bras exist that can support, gently reshape and, if you wish, augment without causing discomfort or damage.
Most American companies have plastic foam bands to support the breasts. For me, that causes a skin rash, but until I found better designs (Check out Goddess's brand, "Kiera" style. It has lift, great shaping and is so well engineered that I sometimes tuck the straps and wear it strapless.) Anyway, until I found that, I would use pieces of cotton to separate my skin from the plastic. Inconvenient, but it worked. By the way, Goddess's "Keira" style is a nearly full coverage bra that comes in RED, navy blue, black, brown and nude. they even have animal prints. Every season you lose a few colors and get new ones in.
Breast balance
As I said, normal people have one breast smaller than the other. A little smaller, a LOT smaller, depending on your luck. This isn’t weird, no matter how much you’ve been teased.
Nipples are placed pretty much anywhere on the breast, high, medium or low, left right, whatever.
Breasts may look like deflated balloons, hanging flat against your midriff..
As long as you’ve seen a gynecologist and know it’s only a cosmetic problem, that’s all it is.
If you’ve bought into the Playboy image of what you should look like and if your poor self image is affecting your life, you may consider surgery. You too can have lovely, slightly scarred breasts that match. (with luck)
Be aware though, there are risks, and NOT just of losing the ability to breast-feed. I’ve received complaints of post surgical nerve damage (permanent) causing these wonderfully sensitive playthings to become permanently numb.
Think about it. You could have surgery (no minor health risk, not to mention painful) in order to attract someone who wants to touch your breasts. Then, while they obsess over the now dead-nerve areas, you're just getting bored! Sound unfair? It is!
If you’ve decided that unnecessary surgery would be stupid, or, you've just read enough Cosmo articles on Advanced Sexual Technique that the man in your life doesn’t notice anything but the sensations you cause in him, Cosmetic Problems of breast balance can be dealt with easily, usually with padding.
Padding
Padding can be anything that works for you. Kleenex has never really gone out of style and is really good on high humidity sweaty days, since you can toss it and repack each time you visit the Ladies' Room.
Catalogs have padding options galore! Everything from a thin layer of foam that is built into both cups, so a slight unevenness is undetectable, to push-up pads that can be used on just one side, and mastectomy prostheses for post-surgery gals, or those of us that are seriously heavier on one side. These things can be made of gel, foam, little bags of fine sand or little pieces of plastic, or even water balloons. The gel and water baloons actually warm to match your body temperature and you can match the density of the pad to your body. In the case of a water balloon, fill it so it's as soft or firm as your breast. Just don't poke it with any pins.
Experiment. See what you like.
Two parting thoughts:
1. Remember that half of shopping is returning what doesn't fit.
2. The problem has never been your breasts. The problem has been finding the right bra for them.
Be stubborn. Be tenacious!
Be beautiful!
Knuti
Think about it. You could have surgery (no minor health risk, not to mention painful) in order to attract someone who wants to touch your breasts. Then, while they obsess over the now dead-nerve areas, you're just getting bored! Sound unfair? It is!
If you’ve decided that unnecessary surgery would be stupid, or, you've just read enough Cosmo articles on Advanced Sexual Technique that the man in your life doesn’t notice anything but the sensations you cause in him, Cosmetic Problems of breast balance can be dealt with easily, usually with padding.
Padding
Padding can be anything that works for you. Kleenex has never really gone out of style and is really good on high humidity sweaty days, since you can toss it and repack each time you visit the Ladies' Room.
Catalogs have padding options galore! Everything from a thin layer of foam that is built into both cups, so a slight unevenness is undetectable, to push-up pads that can be used on just one side, and mastectomy prostheses for post-surgery gals, or those of us that are seriously heavier on one side. These things can be made of gel, foam, little bags of fine sand or little pieces of plastic, or even water balloons. The gel and water baloons actually warm to match your body temperature and you can match the density of the pad to your body. In the case of a water balloon, fill it so it's as soft or firm as your breast. Just don't poke it with any pins.
Experiment. See what you like.
Two parting thoughts:
1. Remember that half of shopping is returning what doesn't fit.
2. The problem has never been your breasts. The problem has been finding the right bra for them.
Be stubborn. Be tenacious!
Be beautiful!
Knuti
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